WASHINGTON D.C.—While it may be weeks before incoming U.S. President Joe Biden and First Lady Jill Biden get fully moved into the White House, he arrived today toting everything he says he needs to have a productive first day.
Among the belongings Biden was observed carrying into the office were a 20-pack of Depend adult diapers, a Tonka truck, numerous Barbie dolls, and a backpack he indicated contained three coloring books, a box of Crayola crayons, a Slinky, and a few snacks.
Biden was asked how he intends to spend his first day. “Well, it’s really up to Kamala. I don’t know what she’ll let me do,” he shared, referring to incoming Vice President Kamala Harris.
“I hope I can eat some apple sauce and then maybe color for a little while. I’ll probably need a nap at some point,” Biden continued. “If I’m a good boy, I can play with my Barbies in the bath and smell their hair as long as no one is watching.”
Supporters and White House staff on hand for the 46th president’s arrival celebrated and looked on adoringly as Biden was gently escorted to a newly-constructed play area housed within the Oval Office.
According to a source close to the situation, Vice President Harris said she had the play area built for Biden to “keep him out of the way while I run my country.”