FORT COLLINS, CO—In a bold step toward ending restroom-based oppression once and for all, Colorado State University’s own Dr. Willow Harrington Twofeather Windsor has unveiled a revolutionary restroom signage system inspired entirely by human genitalia—because nothing says “safe space” like walking toward an anatomically explicit wood carving.
DENVER—In a daring act of investigative heroism that will surely be taught in journalism schools for decades, The Denver Post has confirmed that beloved Rockies mascot “Dinger” is—brace yourselves—an actual human being in a dinosaur suit.
BOULDER, CO — Panic gripped Boulder’s city government this week after motorists reported experiencing the unthinkable: two consecutive green lights.
DENVER, CO — In a shocking exposé that has rocked the gluten-free avocado toast community to its core, The Denver Post revealed Friday that hundreds of Yelp reviewers in the Denver metro area are actually “unlicensed dining critics”—some with no formal training in journalism, zero editor oversight, and, in several cases, limited understanding of béchamel sauce.
DENVER, CO — In a bold new environmental initiative, Colorado lawmakers have announced sweeping tariffs on plastic straws, followed immediately by a surcharge on paper straws, “just to make sure people understand who’s really in charge here.”
The Rocky Mountain Oyster is Colorado’s most fact-checked news source. It was founded in 1859 by licorice magnate P.J. Hornbuckle Jr. and quickly became the newspaper of record for the Rocky Mountain West.
