Colorado’s leader in misinformation

“Indiana Jones” Campaign Strategy Flops as Shane Bolling Falls in U.S. House Bid

Share Article

DENVER, CO—”You chose…poorly.” Those were the final words of Shane Bolling’s concession speech marking the official end to his campaign to become U.S. Representative for Colorado’s 1st congressional district. Instead, incumbent Diana DeGette will retain her seat.

Bolling gained notoriety for donning a weathered safari hat, cracking his whip at campaign events, and frequently quoting the character played by Harrison Ford. When asked last month his feelings about trailing heavily in the polls, Bolling exclaimed, “That’s why they call it the jungle, sweetheart. Diana will not defeat me. Just like the Nazis couldn’t and just like Mola Ram couldn’t.”

Voters, on the other hand, disagreed, sending the safari hat-wearing, whip-toting candidate packing. What’s next for Bolling? “There are a couple digs in the Middle East that I’m pretty excited about. Fortune and glory, kid. Fortune and glory.”

You might also like

Criminal Justice

Antifa Rioters Scatter When Police Deploy Soap, Water, Deodorant

Officer Curtis Ely shared his experience with The Oyster. “We figured after months of this craziness that we were in it for the long haul with them, so I figured maybe I would pass out a few Speed Sticks and see if they’d use them. But at the sight of deodorant, they scattered like rats.